What musician do you respect the most and why?
Scott: Myself because I am the best <laughter>
Aaron: I respect Scott because he is the best.
Carlos: Anybody but Scott because he sucks
Aaron: I like David Lindley the best because he is the master of all string
instruments. He is my favorite guy. David Lindley, D-a-v-i-d L-i-n-d-l-e-y,
Lindley, David Lindley
Scott: Myself because I am the best <laughter>
Carlos: I like the guy.
Scott: The guy, thats a good way to start it buddy. I like the guy
that plays music a lot, and does the thing. You have to excuse Carlos
he does drugs. <laughter>
Carlos: I like Dimebag Darrell from Pantera because his guitar is really
Scott: And his name is Dimebag. <Everyone laughs>
Aaron: They are kidding and I am serious David Lindley, D-a-v-i-d L-i-n-d-l-e-y.
Scott: Myself because I am the best
Aaron: Hes being serious too; Carlos is the only one thats
What profession would you like to try?
Aaron: What profession?
Scott: I would like to try having sex with a doctor.
Scott: A female doctor.
PZO: I dont think that is a profession, but if you would like to
make it one.
Scott: No, isnt that what you mean? What kind of profession would
I like to try having sex with? Isnt that what you mean? <laughter>
Aaron: I would like to be a dentist.
Scott: Wait. I dont understand the question rephrase it. <laughter>
PZO: What would you like to be besides a musician?
Aaron: What kind of job would you like to try?
Scott: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh okay, yeah. Well when I was in kindergarten,
from kindergarten to third grade I wanted to be a stockbroker because
I saw that movie Trading Places with Dan Akroid and Eddie Murphy.
Aaron: And he used to watch Family Ties.
Scott: And I used to watch Family Ties too and they said if you are a
stockbroker even if your clients dont make money you make money,
and when they do make money you make more money. I thought that was a
Aaron: What, making money?
Scott: Yeah making money. I got over that because I joined a band. But
if I could be anything besides being a musician I would probably have
sex with a female doctor.
Aaron: And I would be a dentist, d-e-n-t-i-s-t.
Carlos: I would um.
Aaron: Stop it you are being silly. <laughter>
Carlos: I would probably just uh, you know, some of that. Some of that
Aaron: Quick thinking.
Dan: You can tell he went to school.
Carlos: I would probably go to school, thats what Id do. A
What song would you choose for a theme song for your life?
Scott: Highway To Hell
Aaron: Highway to The Danger Zone by Kenny Loggin. <Starts
singing> "Highway to the danger zone got to take a ride."
<Clicking noise starts> What the hell?
Scott: Thats you man.
Carlos: I would say You Sexy Thing by Hot Chocolate. Yeah,
so thats the one I choose.
Aaron: What in the..?
Scott: You keep pushing.
Aaron: I am not pushing nothing.
Scott: Well, there is a button here.
Aaron: See these buttons? I didnt push them. I dont even know
what that does.
Carlos: Yeah, so thats the one I would choose.
Aaron: What would you choose? <laughter>
Scott: The Long and Winding Road Thats a good question.
What song do you find singing to yourself when you are alone?
Scott: Thats a good question.
Aaron: I always have a song in my head and I am always singing something
different, but my little default whistle is the little guitar line from
the Jimi Hendrix Third Stone From The Sun. <Hums the
song> I always whistle that on accident when there is nothing in
my head. <Whistles the song> That is also in the song, Im
too sexy by Right Said Fred. They are great, except their second
album wasnt as great. That took awhile to get used too.
Scott: Um, the song, the song, whats the question?
Aaron: What song do you find yourself always singing?
Carlos: Im always singing Wanna Be Starting Something
by Michael Jackson. <Starts singing>
Scott: The song I find myself humming its not really something thats
What is one of your favorite lines in one of your songs?
Carlos: Suck my bloody cock.
Aaron: No, thats not a Reel Bug Fish song.
Scott: Oh right, he had me going there too for a second. <laughter>
Aaron: I like, Youll never touch the way that I feel just
for the record she got the deal.
Scott: Thats pretty good.
If you could change something about yourself what would you change and
Scott: Humph <Laughs>
Scott: Come on, are you looking at us? What could possible need to be
changed that would make us-- you are looking at perfection. <Everyone
Aaron: Except for everything.
Carlos: Except for yeah all this stuff.
Scott: If we could change one thing it would be everything.
Carlos: And our cocks.
Aaron: Thats a good answer.
Scott: I think that falls into the category of everything.
Carlos: Oh right. <laughter>
What is something that bothers you the most about one of your band mates?
Aaron: Everything <Everyone laughs>
Scott: The one thing that bothers me the most about some of my band mates
is everything, yeah.
Carlos: Yep, and their cock.
Aaron: That falls under the category of everything.
Carlos: Right, yeah. <laughter>
If you could put a tour together including yourselves, who would be on
Scott: It would be, us.
Scott: Toto, Tenacious D, Thelonius Monk
Aaron: Not Toto <laughs>
Carlos: And Tyra Banks.
Scott: Yeah, Tyra Banks.
PZO: Tyra Banks? I didnt know she could sing.
Carlos: Shes just really hot. <laughter>
Scott: Yeah, she could just stand there onstage for a long time.
Carlos: And say, Look at me. Im Tyra Banks.
If you could see any band perform any song live what would it be?
Carlos: I would love to see a Led Zeppelin set from back in the day. Any
song would do. I have this live DVD thing they did, they put out recently.
There is this guy that is like, This is Led Zeppelin ladies and
gentleman. All proper and stuff, and they just come out and rock
so fucking hard. I could imagine being there at that time and just being
so fucking blown away because no one has ever done that type of music
before. It would just be a mind blow.
Scott: I would like to see The Beatles play Shes Our Heaven.
<Gets a distant look in his face> Yeah, that would be so
great, it would be so special. I just hate music so it wouldnt really
Aaron: I always wanted to see Right Said Fred play Im Too
Sexy. Our old lead singer got to see them and he said they didnt
even have a band they were lip-syncing. This one guy had an acoustic guitar
with all broken strings. <Everyone laughs> I wish I could
have seen that.
What is the worst advice you have ever been given?
Scott: Hey, put your finger in there it feels pretty good. <Everyone
Aaron: Dont worry everything will be fine. Dont worry about
it; its all going to work out just fine. Fuck you. Its not,
Carlos: Um, worst advice...um...yeah, I dont know.
Scott: Worst advice was: "Hey son, if you keep that up you are going
to go blind." "Dad Im over here."
What is something you would never give up and why?
Scott: <laughs> Yeah, man, woo. Oh yeah, who-hoo-hoo.
<Scott and Carlos slap hands>
Aaron: Lets not say that.
Carlos: Stuffed animal collecting.
Scott: Yeah, something, um whats the question again?
Aaron: What is something you would never give up and why?
Scott: Breathing, well Ill give it up once, but that will be it
pretty much. Yeah, so breathing.
Carlos: <Looks at Natalie> Ill never give up loving
you. <Gives Natalie a long hard sexy look into my eyes> And
you too. <Gives PZO_Friend a sexy look>
Scott: That was good.
<Lights on tour bus dim down>
Carlos: Thanks. <Everyone still laughing>
Scott: Thats so smooth.
Carlos: The lights were for you too.
Scott: Yeah, that was nice, the light show.
PZO: That was a good touch.
<Turns lights back on>
Aaron: There you go.
What fashion or fad would you like to see make a comeback?
Carlos: By the way when you talk about this, in parenthesis can you put:
gives a long hard sexy stare into our eyes?
PZO: I can do that.
Carlos: Okay cool.
PZO_Friend: And talk about the light show. <Everyone laughs>
Scott: Whats your question again?
Aaron: What fashion would you like to see comeback? And why.
Scott: Oh, got ya.
PZO: Fashion or fad.
Aaron: Fashion or fad and why, in your own words. <laughter>
Carlos: I liked the pants that had the roll thing. <Starts rolling
up his jeans>
Aaron: Pegged pants, yeah.
Carlos: Pegged pants, I mean<points to his pants> why did
it ever go out of style? <laughter>
Scott: Fucking loser. <Everyone laughs> You know I am a big
fan of the future; Im excited about it.
Aaron: I wish that future look would come back. <laughter>
Scott: So like, fad or fashion from the past, all that retro nonsense.
I say fuck it. You are keeping away the inevitable which is the future,
which is space clothes.
Carlos: Oh and this thing where the kids did this in school where they
did this thing. <Crosses his velcro on his shoes to make a criss
Aaron: Velcro <laughter>
Carlos: Thats pretty cool too.
Scott: See I dont dig it. I dont dig it. Back to the Future
two, they dont even need velcro.
Aaron: I wished those parachute pants would come back. <laughter>
Carlos: Oh and then there is the one when they did this. <Tucks
his pants into his socks> Thats pretty cool too. <laughter>
Aaron: I wish that big baggy t-shirts, shorts, and baseball caps would
Carlos: I wished that the crooked hat thing would come back, and you know.
Scott: I wish that tattoos were cool again. <laughter>
What song are you most proud of and why?
Scott: "Sir Duke".
Aaron: No, one that we wrote.
Aaron: A Reel Big Fish song.
Scott: Oh, "Sir Duke". <Everyone laughs>
Aaron: Im most proud of the break down of Scotts A Dork
<Starts singing> With all the voices say dork, dork, dork,
dork, dork, dork, dork, dork, dork.
Scott: Thats a good part.
Carlos: Im most proud of at the beginning of Dateless losers
when I go one, two, three, four.
Scott: Sir Duke <laughter>
Aaron: Im most proud of, Sir Duke
What is your most embarrassing moment onstage?
Scott: With this band or other bands?
PZO: This one.
Carlos: Well, remember the one time we all forgot what instruments we
Scott: Oh yeah.
Aaron: But that wasnt funny, it was embarrassing.
Carlos: Yeah it was embarrassing to me because I totally forgot what instrument
PZO: How can you forget what instrument you play?
Carlos: I dont know how we did it, the curtains went up and I was
holding a trumpet.
Scott: Well, when you are really done up on coke, <Everyone laughs>
some things get a little crazy. We had been sitting around snorting <makes
pig noises> for probably about two hours, and then we decided to
do some coke. Stuff gets kind of crazy. Its rock and roll. <Shouts>
Stuff gets kind of crazy. Its rock and roll. All right embarrassing,
I dont really get embarrassed it doesnt make a difference.
Carlos: I get embarrassed sometimes when I start the wrong songs. <Everyone
laughs> Its happened to me more than once.
Scott: How can you start the wrong song? Well when you are doing a lot
of coke <Everyone laughs>
Carlos: Thats pretty embarrassing.
Aaron: Oh, dont worry about it.
What do you think is the most important thing to get out of life?
Scott: Yeah, I think the most important thing is to get out of life. <laughter>
Aaron: Youre right, thats a good question.
Scott: The most important thing to get out of life is, when life gives
you lemons, it rains, it pores.
Aaron: If you keep picking it you are going to get the mumps.
Scott: Thats right. <laughter> You cant kill
two birds with a medicine cabinet.
PZO: That makes no sense at all.
Aaron: You can lead a dog to water, but you cant teach an old dog
the make itself a person with a pig and a poke.
Scott: Thats right. <laughter>
Carlos: What was the question again? I am so lost.
Aaron: Get out of life.
Scott: Get out of life. Yeah, get out of life I think thats it.
Aaron: Yes, true.
If you could change places for a day with someone who would it be and
Scott: Fonk Jenson, if I could be Fonk Jenson I wouldnt even leave
the house. I would sit there and play with myself all day long. She is
a beautiful woman.
Aaron: How is that any different then what you do now? <laughter>
Scott: Oh, because I am not a beautiful woman when I am playing with myself.
No, but if I could trade places with anybody in the world it would be
the president. I would get on TV and Ill be like, Oh everybody
all fucked up, listen to what Im going to say.
Aaron: Im really drunk right now. Im really drunk but check
this out. <laughter>
Scott: It doesnt have to be this way, take some advice from me your
El Presidente. This is what I say. Then I would start singing James Brown,
Uh, poppas got a brand new bag. Then I would start disco
dancing and stuff.
Carlos: I would like to be Prince because he is really talented and really
Scott: Super nasty.
Carlos: He is really little too, those little pumps he wears all the time.
Scott: You can wear pumps if you want too, you can just wear pumps.
Carlos: I think it would be pretty cool all around. I mean he has sex
with all kinds of crazy girls, and hes really talented.
Aaron: And he has sex.
Carlos: And hes really short thats pretty cool.
Scott: And he has sex.
Carlos: And he has sex too.
Aaron: And hes talented.
Scott: At sex <laughter> See Carlos and I have never had
sex, so we dont really know what its like.
Carlos: I would be Prince and I would make good songs again like he did
back in the 80s.
Aaron: Back in the 80s
What is one of the strangest gifts a fan has given to you?
Aaron: We get a lot of strange gifts.
Aaron: And I cant think of any right now, but we get some strange
Carlos: I got a fruitcake onetime. I guess that is really not that strange
Scott: Somebody gave us their moms head. Yeah, that was really weird.
Scott: It came in a big jar full of paraldehyde. You know you dont
want to hurt anyones feelings by not accepting. <Everyone
laughs> You want to see it? <Does a booming laugh>
Then you just say thank you very much and then throw it in the archives.
We have this giant warehouse full of things that people have given us
that are actually useless. <laughter>
Scott: And I dont know if you are aware of this, but we also do
Scott: International spy work. <Everyone laughs> There are
a lot of crazy things in this world you just dont want to know about.
So we have a warehouse full of archives from our wacky adventures. We
have a hot air balloon, and petrified giraffes.
PZO: You can fit them in the warehouse?
Scott: Yeah, its a big warehouse. We have a piece of an alien spacecraft.
Carlos: Herbie the love bug.
Scott: We have the actual Herbie the love bug, not the Disney one but
the actual real life one.
Aaron: The real one that the story was based on.
Scott: Yeah, you have got to feed him, but we have someone hired to do
that, Buddy Hackett. Buddy Hackett <Everyone laughs> we have
stuff like that.
Aaron: We have Buddy Hackett.
Scott: And we have Buddy Hackett too, that was a bonus. See we got Buddy
Hackett and then we were all, oh he can feed himself too.